An Ode to standing alone
I was eighteen years old the first time I decided to (wo)man up and take myself on a solo movie date... People go to the movies by themselves all the time. It wasn't really thaaaat big of a deal, but it required me to admit out loud that I was alone on a Friday night, and for that reason it felt equal parts awkward and uncomfortable. I had to give myself a push. When the movie ended and the credits rolled, I sat alone for a few minutes in the dark. I was proud of myself and shocked by how much I actually enjoyed the experience of being on my own.
I realized then that the building blocks of bold are small acts like taking yourself to the movies.
I'm not romanticizing solitude, or saying that you're better for going out in public by yourself, but I am advocating a shift in the negative connotation that comes from letting others know that you are a party of one. I want standing alone in a crowded room to feel like a declaration instead of a confession.
Here's a few definitions of the word independent:
- not influenced or controlled by others in matters of opinion, conduct, etc.; thinking or acting for oneself
- not subject to another's authority or jurisdiction; autonomous; free
- not influenced by the thought or action of others
- not dependent; not depending or contingent upon something else for existence, operation, etc.
- not relying on another or others for aid or support.
- refusing to be under obligation to others
- possessing a competency
Next time you're flying solo, remember what it means to be independent and let it empower you.
Solitude is a lovely practice. There's a sexy layer of confidence in showing up to a bar by yourself to enjoy a drink.